How to Set a Wedding Planner Budget 1-2-3
As a professional wedding planner, I'm often tasked with calming stressed brides and helping them work
through wedding dilemmas. By far, the issue that causes the most stress is money.
Interestingly, money is also one of the top reasons for divorce. Being able to set and stick to a budget is
essential to a successful marriage and is also vital to a stress free wedding planning process. The good news
is that budget related stress is mostly preventable if you practice good habits from the beginning. After years
of working with couples to set and stick to wedding budgets, I've compiled following advice that I hope you
will find helpful.
Questions to Answer: Where, How & What
The first question you should answer when setting your wedding budget is where. Where will you get the money
to pay for wedding expenses? Are you and your fiancé footing the bill alone, or will you be assisted by family
members? Will you use money that you have already saved, or money that you will be saving throughout the
planning process? Gone are the days when tradition dictates who will pay for wedding expenses. While it is
still customary for parents of the bride and groom to chip in, most couples are using their own money to pay
for the majority of wedding expenses.
Once you know where the money is coming
from, you should determine how much you are willing to spend. Notice that I used the word "willing." You
may have $100,000 in savings but are you willing to spend it? Remember to consider life after the wedding.
Do you want to buy a house? Have kids right away? Travel? Be very honest with yourselves and realistic
about your financial priorities.
You should come up with a solid number that is not based on hopes or money that you might have but what you
know you can afford to spend without significantly limiting your post wedding life. This means NOT including
what I call "shadow money" - money that lurks in the "shadows" of your budget but is not guaranteed. If that
money materializes, great. But you don't want to depend on money that never shows up.
Now that you have determined the where and the how, you can move on to what. What is most important to you
for your wedding day? Some couples want to give their guests a great experience, so they splurge on
entertainment, food and beverage. Others want to have the 'wow' factor and splurge on floral design and
lighting. Your desires for your wedding day should guide your budget, not rudimentary spread sheets or budget
making software employed by some websites.
For example, the average wedding in the Washington, DC area where I work is $42,000 and the average number
of guests is 175. Based on these figures, a popular online budgeter recommends that a couple spend $3,360 on
floral design and $2,520 on reception music. If, however, a bride wanted to splurge on flowers and spend $4,500
with her florist, she could easily reduce the reception music budget to $1380. The lesson here is that while
wedding budgeters can be useful as a guide to industry norms and standards, you can tweak your budget to
reflect your desires for your day. I recommend the budgeters at Brides.com and TheKnot.com.
When all of the above questions are answered, you will have determined your overall wedding budget and have
an idea of how much you want to spend in each category. Then you will be ready to move into the active planning
process. The worst mistake that you can make is to meet with vendors without having answered the above
questions and setting your budget.
Couples who meet with vendors and make statements such as "we don't really have a budget," are asking for
disappointment, higher costs and in some cases will be taken advantage of by vendors. Having a firm idea of
what you are willing to pay will assist vendors in presenting options within your budget and makes it more
likely that you will stay within a comfortable price range.
Things to Keep In Mind
- Use a credit card to pay for all wedding expenses and then immediately pay them off. I recommend using
a credit card because in the unfortunate event that something goes wrong (i.e., vendor no shows, missing
items, etc.) it is easier to dispute charges through a credit card company than if you use cash or a check.
Many credit card companies will refund your money and then go after the unscrupulous vendor themselves.
- Don't forget about the little things such as bridal accessories (veil, jewelry), pre-wedding pampering
(manicures, pedicures, haircuts) and attendant gifts. These things tend to slip through the cracks and can
really add up.
- The most effective way to cut your budget is to cut the guest list! Cutting the guest list will cut
your budget in almost every area, including food and beverage costs, rental items (tables, chairs, linens),
and flowers.
- Planning ahead can save you money. By starting early, 12 months or more before the day, you have more
time to shop around and you have a wider selection of vendors to choose from. Early planning can also
prevent rash and costly decisions.
Tiffany R. Wright is a top wedding planner in Washington, DC She is the
founder of PIROUETTE, Inc., a premiere wedding planning company in Maryland, founded in
2005.
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